If you can’t remember the last time you considered where to erect your titular library—take heart. Neither can the nation’s Commander-In-Chief, Joe Biden.
The Joe Biden presidential library is already in development.
The longstanding plan, established when Joe became president, was for his library to exist as a subsection of former and proxy POTUS Barack H. Obama’s presidential library in Hoffman Estates, IL.
“Really,” said Obama, “when we were kicking it around, the idea of Joe having his own library, he is the titular president, but is he the president in fact?”
The Joe Biden presidential library would be housed BENEATH the Obama library.
Until now, the subsection idea hasn’t had any serious competition among Biden insiders.
But on Tuesday, somebody puked this head snapper onto the table: why not establish a Joe Biden Presidential Library and Geriatric Memory Care Center in Delaware?
The idea has its merits.
Not only would all of President Biden’s WH exploits and adventures be on display, but Joe himself will be cared for in perpetuity, will have a place that he can call home.
Mr. Biden might even go on display periodically behind a soundproof glass wall.
Visitors to the center could watch the former President pace the walls searching for an exit, speak to his shadow, and stare out into the starry eyes of his fans, constituents, and even a few lawyers, as he pounds on the glass and says, “Can you get me out of here? I’m looking for the bus stop.”
Plus, if the entity is organized as a non-profit, it’s possible that the handlers of Joe could reap a tidy reward for their servitude, maybe tax free.
….Paging Hunter Biden, please contact the IT department….
As with all great plans, complications abound.
—For example, will Joe be the only patient? Or will other patients be permitted?
It might not be a bad idea to house Joe with like-minded folks.
A high end clientele, housed with the East coast elite former President. Consider senators such as
- Iowa’s Charles E. Grassley, 463 years old;
- California’s Dianne Feinstein, 238 years old;
- Vermont’s Comrade Bernie Sanders, 309 years old;
- and last and least, Kentucky’s moonshine man, Mitch McConnell, 197 years old and drinking a liter of the hooch daily.
—And what happens if a patient with a head full of Alzheimer’s attacks the former POTUS?
Just how would the Secret Service respond?
—Then there is the nasty issue of family members wishing for their loved ones to be displayed behind the glass wall.
Of course, they would have to be told that, contrary to their foolish beliefs, the former President has been, is, and forever will be more important than their loved one, so the answer is, No.
—And who would be qualified to handle, process, and assist his eminence?
What caregiver could receive that level of security clearance?
—Most distressing of all: what if someone steals Joe’s underwear and sells them for profit on eBay?
These, and many other pressing questions, come to the fore when dealing with a possible Joe Biden geriatric center.
So far TEAM BIDEN has made little progress. Some questions take time. They have weightier issues to attend to.
Besides, as everybody except the POTUS knows, by the time the library is built, Joe won’t even know that he was at one time the President…
